Special Little Darling!
Today is the second year of your special day my little peanut. I can't say we "celebrated" but Daddy stayed home from work & Tommy stayed home from school and together with Sarah & I we all just hung out - spending time together, thinking about you.
I have pictures to post but they are still on the camera - we decorated your tree again. You have some new ornaments this year too, so I'll have to post those pictures. It was snowing off and on today and I thought it was perfect with all the snowflakes since that is how I think of you sweetie.
I've been crying a lot these last few weeks. I'm sure some of it was just being afraid to face today, but most of it was because I still miss you like crazy and I still hate this whole thing. I still want you in my arms. I hate thinking about how I should have a 2 year old little girl running around. You should be here. I miss your visits soooooo much and I'm afraid you've left me now that Sarah is here safely.
I sit here bawling - missing you, feeling of guilt for not writing on here more. Please know that I think of you everyday. I guess these feelings will never go away.
Tommy told me that he pictures you peeking over a cloud looking down on us. This made me smile and tear up at the same time. I just wish you could physically be here, even more so since the visits have stopped. Please visit soon - we miss you oh so much.
You are loved and missed everyday Peanut!
Hugs & Kisses xoxoxoxo
I hope you are enjoying your special day up there with all those lovely little friends and with your great Nannies, Nanas, Grandads & Grandpas!!
Love, Mommy!
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
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