My precious Alexandra,
Today you would be 19 months old and I can only imagine what you'd be doing - making us all smile and keeping us busy I'm sure. I can't explain how my heart still aches for you everyday. I am very grateful for you sending us Sarah and I see you in her all the time, but I still miss you like I did before.
I sent you some balloons today with loads of girlie barrettes on them to you and right now I can hardly see as I have been watching them float away up to you.
I feel so guilty for not sending you balloons last month and on your year and a half too. I know you understand but I still feel that guilt and I don't want you to think I am not thinking of you.
I now need to think of some other way to have your special day - maybe planting a flower next month, lighting a candle another, something different each time. I did place your garden stone outside last month and it looks beautiful just like you. It is in the backyard instead of beneath your tree for two reasons - I didn't want anyone stealing it from the front yard and secondly I like the idea of it being in the backyard where we spend most of our time and it's also where Tommy's garden stone is. I just like the feeling of you being closer to us. xoxoxoxo
I'm hoping you will come to visit soon as you know I can't get enough of your visits. I hope you can see how great your little sister is doing and I'm trying to let go of my fears of losing her too. I've been crying alot today and just miss you like crazy. I called you Sarah today and I feel guilty about that too. Just please know you are always my baby girl and I love you sooooo much.
You are loved and missed everyday little Princess!
Hugs & Kisses my Dear!
Love, Mommy! xoxoxoxo
Today you would be 19 months old and I can only imagine what you'd be doing - making us all smile and keeping us busy I'm sure. I can't explain how my heart still aches for you everyday. I am very grateful for you sending us Sarah and I see you in her all the time, but I still miss you like I did before.
I sent you some balloons today with loads of girlie barrettes on them to you and right now I can hardly see as I have been watching them float away up to you.
I feel so guilty for not sending you balloons last month and on your year and a half too. I know you understand but I still feel that guilt and I don't want you to think I am not thinking of you.
I now need to think of some other way to have your special day - maybe planting a flower next month, lighting a candle another, something different each time. I did place your garden stone outside last month and it looks beautiful just like you. It is in the backyard instead of beneath your tree for two reasons - I didn't want anyone stealing it from the front yard and secondly I like the idea of it being in the backyard where we spend most of our time and it's also where Tommy's garden stone is. I just like the feeling of you being closer to us. xoxoxoxo
I'm hoping you will come to visit soon as you know I can't get enough of your visits. I hope you can see how great your little sister is doing and I'm trying to let go of my fears of losing her too. I've been crying alot today and just miss you like crazy. I called you Sarah today and I feel guilty about that too. Just please know you are always my baby girl and I love you sooooo much.
You are loved and missed everyday little Princess!
Hugs & Kisses my Dear!
Love, Mommy! xoxoxoxo
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